The city we're staying in has taken the language of its country and mutated it in strange and random ways. Our personal language expert loves to point out all of the ways the city's version of the language is different from the language in the rest of the country. It's difficult to explain, but the following is how I imagine this situation in America. All apologies to anyone who actually lives in Snailville.
[A native of Snailville, U.S.A is having a conversation with a foreigner, while a Language Expert from a near by city listens in]
Native Speaker: So I was gonna go plant me some haryus, but you kn--
Innocent Bystander: [Interrupting] Pardon me, my good fellow, but what is an 'haryu'? I really don't believe I 'ave ever 'eard that word before.
Language Expert: [Hears the question and strolls over] Perhaps I can help. Here in Snailville they say 'haryu,' but in all America they say carrot.
IB: [Nods his head slowly] I see, please do continue.
NS: The cold kinda stuck 'round late like. It's May an' I still can't open me powers.
IB: [Looks shocked] Your... powers? I say, old chap, perhaps you forgot your 'lectric bill?
NS: [Seems insulted] Of course not!
LE: Here in Snailville they say 'power' which means 'might' or 'strength,' but in all America they say 'window".
IB: Quite good, thank you.
NS: So I'm wonderin' 'bout meh succhini
LE: [Is stumped himself. Lifts his eyebrows] You mean your zucchini.
NS: No, meh succhini.
LE: But in all America they say zucchini...
NS: Well, hereabouts we say succhini!
IB: [Confused] Succhini?
LE: No, succhini means 'bald.' Succhini seems to mean 'zucchini,' but only in Snailville, not in all America.
IB: [Still confused] Succhini...
LE: No, no! Succhini means 'bottle'.
IB: Succhini means 'bald', succhini means 'bottle', and succhini means 'zucchini'?
LE: Yes, in Snailville, but in all America--
[In the middle of the Language Expert's sentence the Innocent Bystander wanders off in a daze, muttering incoherently that it is time for tea.]
Go with God
-Mira
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